We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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