I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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