Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
