from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize