are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
