i woke up with my moms heels on underneath your couch cushions
you want 1 or 2 eggos?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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