I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
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