All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You need a sexual gate keeper
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Randomize
