i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
