You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize