he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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