Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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