I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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