Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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