it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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