I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
