It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
i think i scared a bird with my dick
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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