I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
