"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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