i'm signing you up for texting rehab
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
they need to just BURY HIM!
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize