GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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