3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
