But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
