Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
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