I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
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