would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
