Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
