One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
You told the bartender at least five times that you were naming your son "Jagermeister" but you would use the bartender's name "Fernando" as his middle name. You were drunk.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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