Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
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