It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
