I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it