READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
