Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I think i got beer on your cat.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize