is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
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We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
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Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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