I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
