and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
