Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
