I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
you never un-have a 4some
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize