Just fell off a train. Bad.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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