mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
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