I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
