She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
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