You made me cry and you don't even care
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Randomize
