Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Randomize