it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The lady at the Humaine Society gave me her nephew's number because I seem like a loving and caring person.
Does she know that each time you've adopted a new cat in the past year it's because some guy stopped fucking you and you don't want to eat your feelings?
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize