My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
