I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
drinking out of a sandbucket again
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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