Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize