Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
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I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
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He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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