Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
