his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
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