I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize